Dear..
I'm going to start off this blog with exactly what you want to hear. Yes, I have slept with a lot of people. Most likely, more than you. But I'm going to address the bullshit that I've been hearing a lot of lately... from the girls who know nothing about me, rather what they're just assuming from my MySpace page, and random joking bulletins. And yes, my page is now private on there.
So I figure I'll just lay it all out on the line and you can call me the accurate names.
There's plenty of people out there who've slept with more people than I. There's even more that have slept with less. But does it really matter? In my head, the only thing that matters is one's personal health, safety, and state of mind. If you're not spreading infectious diseases, and you're not a looney bin... meaning, you know you're making your own decisions, then do whatever and whomever you like.
I have no shame in saying who or how many people I've slept with. If I did, I probably wouldn't have slept with them, and they shouldn't have slept with me. if you weren't interested, you wouldn't bring it up. I joke about it, because I think it's funny. Would you like me to name names? How about... no.... But if you've slept with that "High School Heartthrob, Love of Your Life, Band Member, Coke Dealer, Your Best Friend, Construction Worker, Bartender, Co-Worker, Irish Accent, NE Patriot, Her Old Boyfriend, My Biggest Mistake...." then so have I. So consider us even.
How dare you say things about my past, when you know nothing? It's not like your my friend that I've told my darkest secrets to. But since you so politely stuck your nose in my business, I'll tell you. Yes, I've had a real relationship. For five years in fact, with someone I still consider one of the loves of my life. And we broke up because it was the responsible, the right thing to do- to grow up. Yes I had a normal family life, and in fact, my parents are going on their 30-something anniversary. And while I wasn't perfect growing up, I was a misfit-troublemaker that lived on the Dean's List, which has given me the ability to go for my Master's Degree... More than I can say for you?
I apologize that my behavior offends you. I apologize that what I do, creeps into your daily conversation. I apologize that occasionally, I like to live my life, the way men have been able to do for years without being called names. Maybe one day, I'll enjoy cuddling, today I don't. Maybe one day, I'll call him back, today I won't. Maybe one day, he'll be more than just a number on a list, but today he isn't. I apologize if I get bored. I apologize that I drunk dial.
Now believe me when I say that I'm not perfect. I've had to live with a lot of the consequences of my actions. I've had to deal with lots of drama, in fact, it breeds wherever I go it seems. And after reading this, don't think I go out every night sleeping with a different person. I don't. I rarely have one-night stands. I'm not against commitment, but I just don't take it lightly. My name's not.. "Hi, I have a different boyfriend every week and I change my status from Single to In a Relationship every five seconds, telling each and everyone how much I loveeee them xoxox."
I wrote this because I'm not oblivious to my actions; you seem to think I am. Just realize they're my actions, not yours, mine mine mine. I know the before, the during and the after.
Best,
Josie G
